In my most recent creative writing class, we were instructed to write about someone who was either gone, no longer a part of our lives, or someone from a past experience. The prompt was called The Unwritten Letter.
I used it as a chance to release and to express love in one of its purest forms—the love that taught me and keeps me grounded. It’s the love and affection that God has shown me time and time again through forgiveness in the midst of countless lessons and seasons in my life.
Forgiveness is one of the most valuable and freeing gifts known to mankind, yet it is often disregarded, downplayed, and avoided due to pride. If people actually understood the holistic benefits and wealth tied to forgiveness, they’d forgive more often.
Learning to forgive hasn’t always been easy, but what helped me to forgive more was marinating on the fact that my Father in Heaven forgives me over and over. He doesn’t dwell on the past at all. My Lord doesn’t consider the culture, skin color, background, or status prior to forgiving. Yet, we’re notorious for holding grudges for years.
Grudges are like blocks. I view them as blockages—similar to a stroke. The blockage stops oxygen-rich blood from reaching brain cells. In comparison, grudges intercept good things and ultimately imprison you, impacting your memory, mental health, internal health, nervous system, behavior toward yourself and others, your personality, and your character. Failure to forgive causes delays and hindrances.
Once I began to understand the toll that unforgiveness takes on the mind and body, I put a strategy in place to help me release offenses. At this point in life, I take 30 days to pray for the individual—literally. This gives me a chance to hear the offense as I’m speaking to God, thereby releasing it from my mind and heart.
In my quiet time, I release genuine thoughts and feelings. This doesn’t mean the thoughts don’t resurface occasionally, but when they do, I’m reminded that they were forgiven and that the offense will not make a residence in either lobe of my brain.
I believe strongly in renewing the mind. It’s the only sane way to operate in confidence and in truth as stated in the Word of God.
Forgiveness is about your freedom. It’s not about forgetting or excusing behavior but it’s about releasing the burden for your own sake. It’s being humble enough to realize that you have offended someone and need forgiveness on the receiving end. Treat others the way you want to be treated at all times! Do heart checks often, and love yourself enough to work through offering the same gesture of love that your heavenly father grants you.
Don’t let another day go by without forgiving your father, mother, husband, wife, friend, aggressor, abuser, or anyone who has hurt you or betrayed you. Release the weight that you were never meant to carry my friend. Who do you need to forgive so that you can move forward to whatever God has for you? What offense do you need to let go of to free yourself?
With Love,
Patrice Thomas